Broken

It is just a bone, I realize.  And, a small bone at that.  But, it was a first for Joshua, for me, and for our family.

Silly little accidental football injury.  He was tackled by a friend and hit the ground wrong ~ said he heard a pop when his shoulder hit the ground.  But, he was so brave, so strong, so absolutely, undeniably precious.  I sat on my friend's couch with him, running my hands through his hair, and noticing every cute little freckle.  His lips were pouty, and his whole body shook for a little bit.  We face-timed Daddy, and he did an exam via our iphones.

On the way to Erik's office Joshua got scared of how badly Daddy's examination of his shoulder/arm would hurt.  I reminded him that the only other option was another doctor.  He agreed that letting Daddy be the doctor was the best option ~ even if it hurt.

Sean checking out Joshua's collarbone. . .

Sean made me laugh.  He came into Erik's office, put his hand on Erik's shoulder and said, "Brother, not that I'm glad Joshua broke his clavicle or anything, but we are doing life together!!!"  The thought made me smile.  Memories.  Joshua will never forget this day ~ Daddy taking care of him and Sean trying to make him smile.

Joshua getting his first x-ray. . .

My sweet boy's little broken clavicle. . .

The two most uncomfortable parts were the exam, and the putting on of the brace.  Yikes!

But, Daddy was gentle, and Joshua was tough.  He hardly made a sound.  I love that little boy with all my heart, and I love his sweet doctor, too.

But, there is something odd about all of this.  After I got home and reflected a minute, I realized that something somewhere deep inside was bothering me.  What was it?

I struggled to put my finger on it.  But, I finally did.  Part of my son was broken today.  That has never happened prior to this.  I've never seen him hurt like he did today.  An accident happened, and it happened to my son.  Something unpredictable, unpreventable, something completely unusual happened.  How many times has he been tackled??  Many.  It was completely accidental, and that bothers me.  It was a reminder that I can't prevent things from happening to my boys.  I'm still wrestling with it all. But, I know that they are in God's hands not mine.  They will break bones, they will have accidents, and nothing I can do can keep them perfectly safe.  I'm not thrilled about that, but there isn't much I can do about it ~ except trust God, keep walking, and be so thankful that it was just his clavicle that was broken today.

Here he is after we got home. . .

He is sleeping in our big comfy chair tonight because it feels better to be propped up.

He is going to be okay, and I'm pretty sure my heart will be, too.