Friday, April 22, 2011

Giving Birth to Life

I watched a handful of women labor during my nursing school labor and delivery rotation.

But, I only remember one of them.

She gave birth completely naturally, and her birthing experience changed me somewhere deep inside.  I remember going back to my dorm room and rereading the verses in Genesis where God handed out this curse.  I pondered it all, replaying her experience over and over in my mind and solidifying my desire to one day give birth naturally.

Without medications to numb the pain, I wanted to feel it, to know it in its entirety.

I watched this woman filled with pain, agony, actually. She yelled out, said she wanted to quit, wanted out, but there was no way out.  And, then as the pain escalated, her cries at their peak. . .


the baby came. . .


And, the room full of pain and tension instantly gave birth to peace and joy.

Husband relaxed and cried and rejoiced.

Worn completely to the end of herself, the mother's pained expression turned instantly to a face beaming with beauty and love.


I was drawn to something in that room.  It wouldn't let me go.  For weeks I thought of her ~ the beauty I had witnessed in that delivery room.  I longed to one day experience it for myself ~ to birth beauty from agony.  To give all of myself so that another could live ~ to feel it deeply, fully, to hold nothing back.

As God allowed me to experience this all over again one more time just a few weeks ago, I was taken back to the first time I witnessed it as a young student standing with my back to the wall fighting tears.

And, as Easter is upon us, I began to wonder. . .

Maybe that is why I am so drawn to this experience?  Doesn't everything point to Him?  To the One Who gave His all for us?

To the One Who walked that angry hill for you and for me. . .

To the One Who so beautifully suffered excruciating pain, agony unimaginable. . .

To the One Who gave Himself over fully...

To the One Who held nothing back. . .

To the One Whose pain birthed Life for us Who are in Him. . .

He Who suffered greatly, suffered to give us Life. . .

To me, it is such a picture of what Jesus did for me, and therein lies the beauty.

When I finished giving birth to Jack, my young curly, red-headed nurse came back into my room after the doctor and other nurses had left, and looked me in the eyes saying,  "That was so pretty.  You've inspired me."  And, I thought to myself, "It wasn't me."

We are all drawn to Him, to His love.  He is all around us, in our daily experiences ~ if we will open our eyes and see all of life pointing to Him, to the cross, to life and love abundant.

And, I thank Him today as we celebrate the day of His agony.  I thank Him that the pain was not in vain, but gave birth to big, beautiful, abundant LIFE.

7 comments:

Sara said...

This was a beautiful post, Erin. Thanks for pointing us to the cross and helping to remind us of that tremendous gift.

Beth said...

Beautiful, indeed, in So Many Ways.

Christian (Modobject at Home) pointed me to your post...

I gave birth to our 5th daughter/child 9 months ago today, then we added daughter #6 two months ago.

I'll be rereading this several times. Thank you!

Sarah said...

These posts make me hate the distance between us--I want to come over with ice cream and hold that sweet baby and hug you! I love your precious spirit, sweet friend, and I hope tonight as you nurse in the dark, you know how much your friendship has meant to me. Love you :)

Amy said...

Very Sweet! Thank you for sharing and inspiring as you always do!

ADH said...

what a beautiful example of Christ's love. i had to fight tears just reading your post. thank you for sharing such a tender and private moment with the rest of us. :0)

Stacy said...

So, I don't know you and you don't know me. I have followed your blog forever and don't know that I've ever commented. But, that baby is beautiful! Congratulations!

Ami said...

Beautiful birth story, Erin! Everything in creation is meant to point us back to the glory of God. Thank you for reminding me of this.

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Hi! I live in a sweet country home overflowing with love, laughter, and little ones. I have been blessed to journey these days beside a man that I love, respect, and admire. He is my soul-mate and best friend. Together we are seeking to raise our seven children to be lovers of God, to be wise and discerning, and to be all that our sweet God created them to be. I am in the goldfish and cheerio stage of life, but I am keenly aware that these days are slipping right through my hands. This blog is my attempt to keep our memories safe for years to come.

 

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