My Control Journal

It was a few years ago that it hit me. I was doing a Beth Moore Bible study (forgive me, I don't remember which one). As I finished that particular day's lesson, I was overwhelmed by something new God had opened my blind eyes to about myself, a sin that needed to be reckoned with, a sin I had not recognized as sin until that very day. So, I did what I always do when I have a revelation from God. I called Mommy. And, our conversation went something like this. . .

"Mom, it just hit me this morning that I have issues with control in my life."

My mom responded with slight sarcasm in her voice, "Reeaallllly. . . And, you are just now realizing this. . ."

I was completely taken aback. My husband had a similar response when I shared my new found struggle with him. How had I missed what was obviously so clear to those around me?

Denial.

And, I still live there because I really like control.

If I could I would micro-manage my life into a shoe box. Yes, yes, I would. Take for instance the way that I grocery shop. . .

I have a grocery list organized according to my favorite grocery store. I start in the back and work my way to the front. I organize my groceries as I put them in the basket. All items are neatly stacked virtually the same way each time we go since our list is basically the same each week. And, God help JCT if he dares mess with the groceries that I so neatly organize all around him in the back of the buggy. Milk is always lined up against the back of the buggy and all other cold items are placed strategically across the back half of the cart. We work our way to the produce. All produce sits on top of the other items along with the bread. Then, I unload my basket putting produce and bread on the back end of the conveyer belt and work my way to the front where all the cold stuff is kept together. In the middle are all my canned goods and boxed things. It is a beautiful thing, really. And, God help the checker who messes with my organized groceries in order to fill my bags the way she believes is best. Then, I place my groceries in the back of the van a certain way - keeping cold things together, etc., and carry them in the house in this same way. This makes unloading the bags easy and convenient.

Control.

It is a sickness.

It is incurable.

And, I like it, very much. :-)

I won't continue and share the gory details of my pantry organization, toy organization, or my obsession with bins, baskets, and all things that keep order. Let's just say if I am having a bad day I do one of three things. Either I reorganize our schedule, clean out a drawer or cabinet, or if that doesn't do the trick, I load everybody up and we go to Wal-Mart to buy more bins. All of these things truly relax me and just plain make me feel better. I think having children has a way of making one feel completely and utterly out of control. So, any little thing that I can do to make myself feel "on top of it" helps!

A while ago some of you asked about my contol journal. I got the inspiration for this journal from flylady. I use plastic page protectors so that I can use dry erase markers to scratch through things I have accomplished, etc. I have a plastic page protector addiction, but that is another story. I like all my pages typed in my favorite font.

And, now here are the basics of my control journal:

Weekly Goals: This is a general list of goals that I only update on occasion. I read through the list every day or so simply to keep my focus. Examples of things on this page are: Focus on Character Issues with the Boys, Keep clutter off counters in kitchen & utility, Exercise, Eat healthier, Check Flylady - room of the week, etc.

Weekly Schedule: This is a list of the days of the week and the chores and activities unique to that day. For example I do laundry on Monday, Plan meals for the following week & make my grocery list on Thursday, clean out my van & diaper bag on Friday, etc.

Spiritual Focus: This is just a place for me to list lessons that God is teaching me and areas that I consistently need to pray over and remind myself to remain focused on.

My Morning Routine: I once read a book that recommended organizing your day in 30 minute increments. I tried this and went completely crazy. I do long stretches. For example between 6:30 and 8:30 I need to make coffee, breakfast, shower, get the boys dressed and teeth brushed, unload dishwasher, feed fish, etc. This works much better for me. So, the day is broken down into big blocks of time. Also, each day of the week is unique as far as activities outside of the home, so a schedule that is too detailed will simply not work for us. We have certain activities that occur at virtually the same time every single day. For example: Reading & Snack is at 9:30. Lunchtime is at 12. Naptime is at 1. Outside play is from 3:30-5:00. Dinner is at 6:15. Bedtime for the boys is at 8. And, though these times move about a little each day, we pretty much stay within 30 min. of the assigned time.

My Afternoon Routine: It is just what is says. . .

My Before Bed Routine: These are the little things that must be done each night before bed. Lights off, doors locked, phones on chargers, juice and milk cups filled for the next morning, vitamins taken, face washed, clothes layed out for the next day, etc.

I also keep about a years worth, literally, of our family's grocery list in a side pocket of this notebook. Other things that I keep in my control journal are unique to our family. I have Erik's list of landscaping plans for our backyard, and our pool maintenance list, etc.

This journal is certainly not necessary for me to be productive, but I simply enjoy it. I love my control journal. I'm not sure why I love it so much, but I do. It is the skeleton of our day to day life, and it keeps me from feeling out of control. Eventually I'd like to include a list of all our family's favorite meals and monthly menu plans in my journal.

Maybe being a nurse for years and working off a flow sheet has something to do with my desire to keep a schedule. I just know that I am happier and more productive with structure in my day. Hope this has helped! For more information on control journals go to flylady!!!