The Sibling Bond

There is a wonderful man who runs the Chick-fil-a at our local mall. Deana B. and I meet at the mall and eat Chick-fil-a with the kiddos every Wednesday at lunchtime. M., the owner of our mall's Chick-fil-a, knows us by name and expects to see us every Wed. When we skip a week, he notices our absence. One Monday M. realized that over the weekend they had run out of the little stick-on placemats for Kid's meals. He ordered them next day air because he knew that we would be counting on them that Wednesday. Didn't I tell you he was wonderful?

Anyway, Erik and I ate at the mall recently, and after dinner I went to Chick-fil-a to get a milkshake. Because, really, is there a better milkshake than a Chick-fil-a milkshake? I am finally starting to show a bit, and for the first time M. noticed my swelling abdomen. He smiled at me with eyes wide and put his hands on his belly! I nodded to let him know that he had assessed correctly - I am with child, again. He quickly pulled one of his employees over to introduce him to me. M. said, "This is Joseph. He is the oldest of five children." Joseph took my order and talked with me about his opinion of growing up in a large family. He smiled as he reminisced about his childhood. The comment that stuck with me almost as much as his contagiously sweet smile was, "I can honestly say that growing up I was never bored. There was always something to do and someone to do it with. Still today, when we are all home, it is very. . . entertaining. . ."

For several hours and days now, I have pondered his statement. And, I was reminded of it, once again, this morning as I changed out the boys winter and summer clothes. I was carefully folding Elijah's winter things and placing them in a big bin when it hit me that I would be pulling these same clothes out again next winter for a little man we have yet to meet! I felt a funny little twinge of excitement that started in my toes and worked its way like electricity through my body. I daydreamed for a second about introducing my big boys to this new little one. The thought made me grin from ear to ear. I love having a baby in the house! I can't imagine the day when I don't have one. I'm not sure that I want to imagine it! I love soft sweet baby cheeks to kiss. And, thankfully, I don't have to worry about that for another year or so. I feel sure that I'll be ready to let go of the baby days when the time is right.

Somedays I contemplate our family. And, somedays I feel that maybe Erik and I got in a little over our heads. 3 children so close in age can be crazy at times especially for a pregnant mama. But, it is exactly what God wants for our family. I have no doubt about that.

Last week I was holding a protesting JCT in my arms on my way to take him upstairs for a nap. Joshua begged me to let him go upstairs with JCT. "Plllleeeeaasssse, Mommy, let me go up and play with him. Don't make him take a nap. I want to play with JCT!!" I smiled and said, "But, Joshua, I will play with you. We can play a game. Do you want to play a game with Mommy?"

His response was, "No, Mommy, I don't want to play with you. I want to play with JCT!"

I must admit, I was taken aback at first. My thoughts went something like this. . .

Excuse me, you don't want to play with me? What do you mean you don't want to play with me. I thought I was the alpha and the omega of playmates! What are you saying? Are you saying JCT is more fun than me? Because I'll show you fun. You just wait, I'll show you fun. I gave birth to you. I've known you longer. I know you better. I'll show you fun.

But, after my selfish moment, I realized that this was truly a wonderful thing, and it wasn't about me. It was about them. They are bonding. My boys are bonding. They are developing their own unique relationship, or rather - their own special friendship. And, that is the way it is supposed to be. Because, one day, it is my prayer, that their frienship will outlast my life. And, when I am no longer here to comfort and take care of them, it is my prayer that they will comfort and take care of eachother.

And, in the meantime, they may not have a perfect childhood, but, at least according to Joseph, they will never be bored. There will always be something to do and someone to do it with, and that is a good thing - even when - especially when - that someone isn't always me.